I have never felt so alone
Used to like it this way
When she left she took my soul
Kept my heart in dismay
Desperation comes and goes
Suffering's a mainstay
Though I know she helped me grow
Now I could give a fuck what they say

Never miss an opportunity to squander one
Ruthlessly I con along and lucidly I ponder on
If truthfully I got it wrong or my perception was spot on
Doesn't matter anymore, tell that to my withered poor
Heart and soul left broken battered
Harsh and cold, I know I matter
Even though disposal shattered
Spirit so so hopeless scattered
Best friend in the whole wide planet
Least with two legs - oh hi Sasha
That's my baby - love her like good parents love their kids yo
When she pass I'm out of here
Call me pussy coward weird
Freak if you like
Give a fuck what you think - that's some real shit
Music been dope - grew from grim hope
Care less if you feel it
Opinions worth as little as I felt I was when she split
Seem sick it's cause I am, mind stay in the gutter man
Needs a cleansing - fiend for ending this life in a breath quick
Is it called cross dress if I rock a long tight ropey necklace
And is that something country bumpkins might not be impressed with
Honest guess is yes bitch
On my death bed let's sit
And pre-tend that it isn't over
Dreams end wake up cold and sober
Taught me to lucid dream
And all I could do was fiend
To see her face and tell her something
Never knew that hell was comin'
Jilted me subliminally
Still I didn't see
Foolishly figured we
The epitome of symmetry
Thought we'd go together on some BPD and DBT shit
Hopin' she'd capiche my state emotionally
Appreciate it totally
And even maybe grow with me
On some "please please baby don't you see"
That weak debased and phony me is long dead
Now there's only thee
Real thing tainted broke but free
Don't pretend there's hope for me
To ever live a life with meaning
Tried so hard to soothe the screaming
Silently inside of me
Drown it out with loudness now
But hear it on those quiet evenings
Feel that inner riot seething
Feel that inner riot seething
Feel that inner riot?

Maybe I'm a violent being
Deep down but I lie and cheat
And try to be the righteous me
Society would like to see
Like to think I'm better
But been on the brink forever
And they cannot grip my tether
So if I slip I'm never comin' back
Like to think I'm better
But been on the brink forever
And they cannot grip my tether
So if I slip I'm never comin' back

.. said if I slip I'm never comin' back

Freak show paragon
Deemed broke bad and wrong
Theme so sad and sombre
Death rap's my genre
Ain't classified at JB
Won't hear it on the J's please
They seem so Alan Bond, lately
I'm still havin' fun with it
Content to just kick it
Till they attempt to fuck with it
Then I'll get my savage on
On some beast mode mastadon shit
Shit is bleak yo, that's just honest
Bucket list long, my fuck it list longer
Turn this rap game into fuckin' Dishonored
Stealth killin' shit, guess I felt ill equipped
Way back in the day, now I'm packin' that blade
That'll lacerate faces like havin' a shave with
A can of that mace shit, Mortein for rapists
And other wack plagues who masquerade human
Then suffocate burnin', that's just fate loomin'

This music wouldn't exist without her
Maybe I would though, so
Should I be upset or thankful
Guess that I feel both, oh
Not for all my little words
Splendid butterfly soul
Wings that make her beautiful
Gracefully she fly away from me...